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“I can't take you seriously when you're dressed like that! I'm sorry, Mikuru, but I'm being controlled by the alien right now. Here goes nothing!”
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“I can't take you seriously when you're dressed like that! I'm sorry, Mikuru, but I'm being controlled by the alien right now. Here goes nothing!”
“I'll back off for now. Next time I won't hesitate to destroy you. Take this time to make your tombstone...”
“I had a dream where I fell into a surreal world with a girl I knew, and then ended up kissing her! A dream so easy to understand that even Sigmund Freud would laugh out loud.”
“Afterall, the fate of the world rests on my pitching. The world sure isn't worth much these days.”
“*referring to Haruhi* It would appear that she views guys on the same level as potatoes.”
“Kyon-kun. If I become ruined for marriage will you take me?”
“Kyon. The contest begins the second someone challenges you. Anything the loser says otherwise is merely an excuse.”
“*commenting on Haruhi's naming of the SOS brigade* Haruhi's incomprehensible words settled the matter. Oh, joy. Just do whatever you want.”
“*mockingly* That's amazing, Mikuru! We're counting on you! The Earth is in your-- *breaks into uncontrollable and hysterical laughter*”
“*to Haruhi* Are you a moron?”
“Emblem? Looks like a grumbling, drunken tapeworm to me.”
“If your face gets any closer, someone who isn't supposed to be in this scene is going to come over there and kick your ass!”
“A picture of you sleeping with a stupid look on your face totally oblivious to the dangers of this trip serves as a warning to future generations!”
“Let's calm down. The enemy is shooting at us.”
“Anyone accepting defeat will be punished by running ten laps around the school, naked! And you'll have to yell "Green Martians are chasing me!" for the whole ten laps!”
“... After all, our goal each year should be to increase the NUMBER of goals we set for ourselves!”
“You're the new Adam and Eve. Go on, procreate, increase the population.”